Shel Silverstein once wrote: Eatin’ soup with chopsticks—I should be finished soon. Eatin’ soup with chopsticks While whistlin’ a tune. Eatin’ soup with chopsticks Because I have no spoon. Eatin’ soup with chopstick Can take all afternoon. At first glance, Silverstein’s poem reads like playful nonsense, typical of his childlike humor. But beneath the whimsy lies something deeply human. How often do we, too, find ourselves eatin’ soup with chopsticks , using the wrong tools,

When Therapy Turns into a Horror Story Not all monsters hide under beds. Some hide behind cardigans and overstuffed chairs. Every October, I’m reminded that the scariest things I’ve ever encountered didn’t happen in a dark alley; they happened in the counseling room. I’m not talking about clients’ trauma (that’s sacred work). I’m talking about what I’ve heard  from clients after working with other therapists. These are real statements, each one a little horror story of its ow

In studying moral injury, I became increasingly aware that trauma is not only psychological but profoundly ethical—a fracture in one’s sense of goodness, trust, and belonging. Through this work and continued research, the term Post-Impact Survivor  emerged as a way to describe those living in the aftermath of such invisible ruptures. My thinking was shaped in part by Robert W. McChesney’s The Soul Also Keeps the Score , which explores how guilt, shame, and moral dissonance al

By the time she sat across from me, the uniform didn’t fit anymore. Her badge still shone, but it no longer meant what it once did. She had spent twenty years as a police officer, running toward what others ran from, believing that courage could redeem the chaos she’d been born into. Her childhood was marked by neglect and violence, the kind of wounds that teach a child to survive by control. She learned early that love was unreliable, that safety had to be earned, that worth

There are few experiences more powerful, or more painful, than the experience of being seen. To be truly seen by another human being can feel like standing in the light after a long season in shadow. It’s disorienting, intimate, sometimes terrifying. And yet, it is the very thing that allows transformation to begin. The Ache of Being Unseen I recently experienced this myself. To be within a group, yet unseen. Surrounded by people, yet unseen. What I felt was a tumult of emoti

Let’s just say it; most people don’t walk into therapy hoping to feel like a student again. You’re likely overwhelmed, stressed, or...

When I speak directly about problems in our field, as I did in a recent LinkedIn exchange , the reactions are telling. Many colleagues...

Flight anxiety is one of the most common fears I encounter in my practice. For some, it shows up as mild worry at the thought of...

AI Generated Image We live in a culture that celebrates options. From careers to relationships, from what to stream on Netflix to how to...

In the past weeks, headlines have once again reminded us how fragile life can be. When innocent lives are taken, whether through...

What makes counseling actually work? It’s a question clients often carry into their first session, and one I’ve asked myself for years as...

As counselors, our first responsibility is always the well-being of the client. That commitment can sometimes place us in uncomfortable...

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The Gestalt Concept of Unfinished Business Fritz Perls, the founder of Gestalt therapy, often spoke of “unfinished business”: the...

Most therapy models encourage clients to set goals , but too often, those goals are vague. “I want to feel better.” “I want less...

In her short piece Borderland , found in The Art of Eating , M.F.K. Fisher captures something that neuroscience would later confirm: food...

Image: Lin Health In the 1600s, René Descartes famously wrote, “Cogito, ergo sum” ," I think, therefore I am . With that phrase, he drew...

A few weeks ago, I gave myself space for a practice I use quarterly: free association. Originally a psychoanalytic tool, free association...

There’s a lie that creeps into too many minds, especially the ones I work with. It doesn’t usually sound like “I’m worthless.”It sounds...

There’s a trending reel format circulating on Instagram: “What I’d say as your therapist if I wasn’t worried about your feelings.” But...