One of my greatest pitfalls is watching others and thinking, “Yes! I want to be them!"
This thought may seem trivial to you, but for me, it has led me down paths of ruin.
Too many times, it led me to choose myself over my family. Too often, it led me to choose the quick fix over a tried and true process. Too often, it led me to ignorance in relationships over the deliberate choice of those I surround myself with.
I’ve dubbed this “my siren song.”
Sirens are dangerous creatures who lured nearby sailors with their enchanting songs only to shipwreck them on a rocky coast. Lore says there are three types of Sirens, those who harken you to heaven, those who beckon you to hell, and those who simply seek to wreak havoc on earth.
Regardless of the Siren whose song I was listening to, I can say seeking a quick fix can and has led to ruin in multiple areas of my life.
I’ve learned to identify the first notes of my Siren song, the tempting tune toward the rocky shores of a quick fix, the next best thing, or the all too cozy "Everything just fine" thought process. Now, I’ve found the ability to pause and release these instantly gratifying fixes and welcome my development.
Discovered Then Developed
I believe, in part, my temptation toward these choices is directly related to having recognized my life’s purpose. I believe at a very young age, I was given my purpose, and I recognize how feeling this deeper sense of calling could ignite a desire to pursue it swiftly and with greater effect.
My clients mirror the same actions, feelings, and choices toward pursuing their goals, dreams, and purpose. When the “call” is heard, the allure is to think they have to do everything at once, and this will automatically lead to their discovery and instantaneous success.
This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Pursuing dreams, goals, or purposes needs time to be developed. In fact, growth, maturity, and success are not instant. You can’t immediately climb the proverbial ladder to success simply because you have had your “a-ha” moment. Changing ingrained, life-long patterns of thinking and acting takes work, and steady work at that.
The path of development can be slow, arduous, and challenging. Time seems to creep along, and the path feels like it continues to extend with no end.
This does not indicate that your goals, purpose, and healing are put on hold.
It means it’s a gradual process, and if you can embrace development, the benefits are a heightened sense of purpose, greater self-awareness, insight into how your goals can be aligned deeply with your values, and having the anchor of confidence while avoiding being tossed into a rocky shoreline.
Some say not everyone has a purpose, and pursuing whole wellness is silly. I disagree.
Those are the voices of individuals who refused the gradual path of development and sought out quick discovery. Those individuals blame circumstances, people, and environments for their failures. Those individuals failed to recognize their “Siren song” that led them to the rocky shoreline. Those are often the people that led us to seek out counseling in the first place.
You have been created with a purpose and, firstly, a purpose of being a whole healed self; Recognize the allure of quick fixes. Hold steady in the humble beginnings and painstaking processes, and encounter how a developed purpose gives more than discovery. It gives a lifelong benefit for you and those around you.